Book Review | Without Prejudice By Author Devasis | Epic Tale Of A Mumbai Bar Dancer | Fiction Meets Facts | Opinion

Tale of a bar dancer in Mumbai, erstwhile Bombay, the land of dreams.

Background

Mumbai has always occupied a unique space in collective Indian mind. It is the most fashionable, most headline-grabbing, most glamorous and the most sought after city where India's biggest celebrities (actors, cricketers, businessmen, industrialists, playboys etc.) reside...This is the city of dreams, this is the city where 100s arrive everyday in dreams of becoming the next Shah Rukh Khan or next Aishwarya Rai, next Sachin Tendulkar or next Ratan Tata!

And like all the great cities in the world, there is a flourishing underbelly to this glittering city too. An underbelly full of violence, broken dreams, disappointments, crime, seedy localities, slums, abject poverty...This side of Mumbai is as widely covered in our popular culture as the glamorous and rich side of this megapolis.

A famous (or infamous!) shade of this underbelly has been the Mumbai bar dancer industry. This issue gained widespread attention with the movie Chandni Bar by Madhur Bhandarkar. Even in many other movies, bar dancers have played a prominent role, especially in stories related to underworld dons and notorious criminals. In modern Bollywood, bar dancers have often replaced the role played by Helen and Bindu in classical Bollywood era, that of quintessential 'item songs' girls to make movies more mass-based and commercially viable. In real life, most of the time, they have not been considered anything more than a 'prostitute' who puts the front of a 'mere dancing girl' to lure customers/patrons. Ask any common Indian on the street and it would be rare to come across a good opinion of bar dancer girls. For a layman, a 'tawayef' in 'kotha', a prostitute in red light district and a bar dancer are one and the same. 

Subject Matter

But where did these bar dancers come from? Beneath all the seedy dance bars, shady patrons, gaudy costumes, layers of makeup and whispers of prostitution, surely these are also human beings with complex personalities and complicated emotions. Does the society assume that a person is born with dreams of being a bar dancer? Why do we not look at them as humans anymore? What is their perspective on this attitude of society towards them? Do they wish to leave this industry and if they did, would the society accept them as a normal, dignified individual?

Without Prejudice by Author Devasis is an attempt to delve into this industry through personal story of 1 bar dancer, gleaned from his personal research into the subject matter and it does throw up some eye-opening facts related to bar dancers.

We meet Munia as a little child on the cusp of teenage, bartered as a precious cattle to be fed and groomed for her future role as a concubine, her destiny already pre-decided because of her caste. Through the eyes of her groomers and childhood 'protectors' (who frankly are saving her just to throw her to the wolf who pays the most for her innocence), we see her transform into Pallavi and then end up at perspectives shared by Roy and Rajkumar, 2 men who play an important role in Pallavi's life as a young bar dancer. Through their conversations and Roy's research into bar dancers' history (he is a journalist), the reader also understands the nuances of this sensitive, complicated topic. 

Personal Thoughts 

1. When I started Without Prejudice, frankly I thought this would be a typical 'prostitute with a heart of gold' story-line. Yup, I am ashamed to recognize myself as someone who takes refuge in stereotyping too. Having seen many movies like Pretty Woman, I thought that is the only track a story like this can take. Here is a woman, she is pretty, young and innocent with big dreams, she comes to Mumbai to achieve success and gets sucked into the big bad underworld where she is forced to sell her body and then she meets a handsome, kind hero who saves her from this wretched world because he recognizes her precious heart and they live happily ever after!

Wrong.

The story is pretty tightly scripted and while there are many cliches involved, they do not overshadow the fact that characters in Without Prejudice are richly developed, complex and give us an insight into their thought process. Yes, there is a happy ending and the last 20 pages of the story felt a bit rushed but it still ended up being very different from what I had expected. I finished the book in one sitting which would have been impossible if it was just another reproduction of something like 'pretty woman'. So kudos to the author for bringing to life a unique story.

2. Though the title says it is the journey of a bar dancer, we also see glimpses of other issues such as lack of communication in modern marriages, inside working of dance bars and HR policies being implemented informally there, political patronage supplied to seedy underbellies of our society, prejudice of not only a common person against dance bars but even media outlets prejudiced against them as worst social segments and so on. These are thought provoking instances that keep the story rooted in reality and also show the kind of in-depth research author did on the subject matter. This also does not let the story becoming claustrophobic by just setting it inside a dance bar, rather we keep moving through bars, newspaper offices, hill stations and page 3 society of Mumbai.

3. I personally liked the Yin and Yang approach showing the good and bad in every situation. There is a particular conversation that the character of Roy has with a taxi driver working outside Pallavi's dance bar that gives a nice overview of how different people look at same situation differently. It also brought out the spirit of struggle for survival in this tough city where people gotta do whatever they gotta do to keep a roof over their head, food in their bellies and clothes on their body without wasting their time on worrying about getting judged as 'badnaam aurat'. It wasn't moralistic, it was real and worth remembering. Inclusion of such conversations kept the task of reading Without Prejudice humane.

4. Most importantly, Without Prejudice brought to light extremely disturbing facts about the birth of the tribe of bar dancers, so to speak. Who knew that we actually had a Criminal Tribes Act of 1871 that branded people from 125 Indian castes, tribes and communities as born criminals thus making it virtually impossible for them to get any gainful employment? Even though they later became Denotified Tribes, the prejudice against them continued. This, combined by quite a few other socio-economic and historical factors, contributed the most in rise of bar dancers/ seedy 'massage parlors' and a good percentage of inhabitants in red light districts. This particular portion of the novel is worth its weight in gold as it transforms this journey of a bar dancer into  a huge cauldron of simmering social + cultural + economic + historical elements that most of us are unaware of, something that we ought to rectify right now. 

5. Finally, I would recommend Without Prejudice for the simple reason that it makes an argument for a consistent language for humanity everywhere- one that should dispel rumors and prejudices and embrace kindness, compassion, dignity for all people. From the Geishas of Japan to Bar Dancers of Mumbai to Strip Dancers of USA, there are similar human stories to be heard everywhere if one is willing to listen. And willing to listen we must be, as that is the first step to live a true life Without Prejudice!

A good read, go get it :)

Image Source -Niyogi Books

Book Review | Borderline By Author Shabri Prasad Singh | Mental Health Catharsis | Fiction Meets Facts | Opinion

Background

'Paagal hai kya'- A common refrain heard in India, sometimes in jest, sometimes in frustration. It is a word we loosely throw around without ever thinking of the serious subject matter it denotes -Mental Health. And then we worsen the situation by dumping every mental health related discussion in this very category of 'paagal'. Popular culture has more or less just added fuel to fire with numerous depictions of mental health institutions in dilapidated condition, hitler-esque doctors conducting weird experiments on inmates and the dreaded electric shock. Result is that every temper tantrum, every fist fight and every depressing situation is ignored/increased in India by remembering the horror of /using the taunt of 'being a pagal' and 'going to a pagalkhana'.

Subject Matter

It is thus a refreshing change to come across the book 'Borderline' by Author Shabri Prasad Singh that aims to tackle the much ignored as well as much maligned subject of Mental Health, not by way of eye-opening statistics, graphs, charts or sermons; but by way of a deeply personal journey of her own life as someone who has struggled long with Borderline Personality Disorder. Her alter ego aka Amrita Srivastava takes us on a ride through her childhood to adulthood and beyond, from being a part of a happy loving wealthy close-knit family as a child to shattering of that mirage with her parents' divorce, her era of teenage rebellion, extreme attention seeking behavior and lingering relationship issues well into her 20s and 30s. Her emotional extremes are triggered as a jolt by instances such as untimely death of her father who she was closest to, to feeling used and abused by her closest romantic relationship and thereafter a long spiral into the world of drugs. Her willpower to wade bravely through the lowest lows and take concrete step to get therapy lends an optimistic air to this personal saga of tragedy and sorrow. 

Personal Thoughts

1. The easiest job in this world is to point a finger at someone else. Feeling high and mighty while making someone else feel small and sad, we humans find it so easy and tempting to do. Just take a look at social media. Thousands have made a career out of 'trolling' and making memes! But what is the toughest job in this world? To point the same finger at oneself. To be emotionally naked and stand in front of the world, warts and all. The author does this marvelously in Borderline, which gains her massive respect from my side. The story flows seamlessly from one chapter of her life to another, filled with intriguing moments, much like an intense drama TV show and she gives a balanced view of all that happens, without making it sound like someone else's fault. That is not easy to achieve. If today I were to write a book about some of my childhood situations that molded my personality, I would be sorely tempted to place blame on someone else for all my shortcomings - 'This happened because xyz was mean to me'- but Shabri aka Amrita does not do this. This makes it easy for reader to look at every situation with an objective lens too. 

2. Author's honesty in accepting her shortcomings also makes it easier for us to look inside our own lives on all that we might think of as 'normal'. Her portrayal of being emotionally abused by the person she was romantically involved with or her description of turning into a stalker or going to any extreme to find validation for her very existence - these points might seem extreme but on thinking about it for a moment or two, I found that quite a lot of my normal friends (and sometimes I too) have indulged in some kind of emotional power game with each other. It is important to be self-critical in this way so that we may be better equipped to use the resources available to us for dealing with our shortcomings.

3. Borderline comes at an opportune moment. Claire Danes plays the main character of Homeland (one of my very favorite TV Shows) who suffers from bipolar disorder and the show is a gripping political action drama while sensitively portraying her mental health issues. Meanwhile, Deepika Padukone has made waves by openly talking about her struggle with depression and become a strong public face for the need to eliminate shame while talking about mental health issues. Borderline is a very brave step forward in the same direction. By taking mental health out of the shadows of hush-hush conversations dipped in a cloak of shame, it is an important reminder to society at large to be more sensitive and upgrade with changing times.

4. We live in a fast-paced world, with so much development in the field of technology, communications, healthcare, media and what not. But this is also the time when most of us are at our loneliest. The biggest message I got from Borderline is to keep an eye out for others. Brain is a complex organ, even scientists haven't been able to completely decipher all its secrets. We do not know for sure why some people are more prone to Depression or Parkinson or Alzheimer or Bipolar Disorder etc. But They Are! We All Are! And we need each other's help. In modern times of rapidly disintegrating familial relationships and intense materialism invading every part of our life, we have to take some time out to be kind, sensitive and considerate to each other as well as ourselves. In a rat race to be the 'best' and own the 'biggest, largest, most expensive' things, we might be losing a part of the very core that makes humanity beautiful. 

5.  It is harrowing to see Amrita, the protagonist, deal with the demons in her head, the loneliness and heartbreak she feels at every turn without being able to share them with anyone. It is an urgent reminder to all of us to be a part of the solution, not the problem. Our society places too less importance on anything related to mental health. So many times we will see someone sad and just say 'oh you have the blues, that is it, shake it off'. But what if it cannot be shaken off? We need robust resources, trained therapists, well-functioning and well-equipped institutions, strong support groups to altogether deal with this elephant in the room. The author was lucky to have met Dr. Sanjay Chugh and therapist Purnima who have helped her heal, but even this came after a horrible stint at an apathetic institution where every mental health issue was treated in the same way we have been trained to deal with it -say 'paagal hai' and give electric shocks!

6. Finally, even while dealing with the mammoth issue of mental health and heavy dose of tragedy, the author slips in little life lessons at every turn peppered with apt quotes, a few of which are:-

--'Permanency is a myth, change is the only constant'
--'To love oneself is the most important thing to do, otherwise all other love is hollow if you can't love you'
--'Remember there cannot be a rose without a thorn'

I also have a feeling that the author has immense intuitive skills or maybe her anxiety gives her this power to look beyond the obvious and reach the core of every situation. Throughout her life journey, she gets jittery before any bad event, be it her father's death or meltdown  after breakup with Hafeez. I have read many books where this kind of 6th sense is attributed to unexplained parts of our brain, be it premonition, precognition, deja vu or ESP. Maybe all those whom we categorize as 'mentally unusual or disturbed' also carry some heightened awareness that we haven't been able to understand or categorize. Maybe some day all the mysteries of brain will be unwrapped and we will look back at the days of calling everyone 'paagal' as a long-lost footnote in history!

As of now, I recommend Borderline as a Must-Read for everyone :)

Image Source - Bloomsbury 

The Story Of A Suicide | Sriram Ayer | Saga Of A Killer Among Us | Book Review | Opinion

We live, We die, End of story.

But sometimes the story ends abruptly, way before it should have, when someone decides to commit suicide.

The dreaded S word. There are many points and counterpoints regarding this volatile topic but instead of pontificating about it from a high pedestal, how about giving it a friendly look in the simplest way possible?

This is exactly what 'The Story Of A Suicide' attempts. This novel by Sriram Ayer approaches this not as a cataclysmic event that needs to be treated with either kid gloves or a national breaking news level cacophony, rather as a personal event that everybody can relate to.

THE STORY

Hari, Sam, Mani and Charu are the four protagonists whom the story revolves around. One of them commits suicide because of the violent web of relationships tangled in jealousy, revenge, misunderstanding and heightened emotions that grip them all.

Hari is a childhood sexual abuse survivor, Mani belongs to an economically impoverished background and both of them are grappling wit their sexual identity. Sam belongs to a privileged background, is a self - avowed tech geek and imprisoned by his hormonal desires towards Charu who is a ultra progressive, free-as-a-bird, care-a-damn girl with an agenda to set things right in the world but without any specific plan to do so. All of them bump into each other at prestigious KIT college and a cosmic plan seems to have been put into motion. Friendship, Infatuation, Confusion, Love, Misunderstanding, Jealousy, Revenge, Lust, Fear and more collide till they are all at their breaking points. Finally, someone breaks. But Who? And most importantly, could it have been avoided?

SPECIAL MENTION

Since the story is truly addictive, I would loathe to give out any major story twist so that other readers can derive their pleasure of having read a beautiful story to its end on their own. But I would definitely like to put forth a glimpse of some of the issues that have been raised in this journey :-

• Indian Culture - A potent glimpse at how we as a society, as a family, burden our youngsters with our expectations, chalk out their future for them and sweep under the carpet anything that makes us uncomfortable or threatens our 'values'.

• Twisted 'Isms'- The concept of feminism has been twisted, turned, abused and so has been the concept of masculinity. The equation of power between the genders is completely topsy-turvy and it is interesting to see the characters (especially Charu and Sam grapple through it)

• Fear of Social Rejection - After all, we need acceptance. The fear of being labelled something unsavory in front of our peers makes us keep our deepest nightmares to ourselves which often leads to drastic consequences. This is especially true for the teenagers and college goers because this is the time when our hormones play havoc and our emotions are heightened. 

• Social Media - A story so deep rooted in the youngsters' worlds has to keep technology in starring role and The Story of A Suicide does it marvelously with topics of hacking, cyber stalking/ bullying and online violence playing the most crucial role in pushing forward the story.

• Suicide as a weapon - It is not only the harried characters who think of suicide as a means of being free or getting away from the unbearable situations, quite a few supporting characters in the story bring it up as a means of fighting the 'guilt' or 'shame' of having failed in the eyes of society (as a parent/as a son/as a gender and so on) which makes this part the most relatable for me. 

PERSONAL MEMORY

When I was 10 years old, we had a new family move into our apartment block in Patna. They had a 25 year old son who always lived indoors, had no job, went nowhere, just sat at the window of his room and stared outside. A few weeks down the line, we started hearing loud noises of altercation from the flat. It came to fore that the son was a drug addict who had swindled all his tuition fees into drugs, got into a bad spot with some loan sharks and his family had to shift cities to keep themselves safe. He was a genius but alas, without any idea of how to navigate social realities and preferred to remain in his world of drug-induced haze. His mother would thus keep up nights howling in pain cursing him and herself, crying out loud 'Oh I should commit suicide, why am I even alive, I have failed as a mother'. It sort of became a cruel joke in the neighborhood and people loved copying her painful cries at parties. As a kid of course I had no idea what all this meant. But today I do. 

It is actually commonplace to hear such cries in our neighborhoods. 

Parents feel like they failed in raising a good child = want to commit suicide, 

kids get less marks in school = suicide, 

son marries out of caste = conservative parents threaten to commit suicide, 

daughter has pre-marital relations = society shames whole family into suicide, 

girl gets raped = 'better she commit suicide than live with this shame',

morphed images/videos get leaked = 'why live in such shame,what will society say,commit suicide'

Oh by the way, the genius yet drug addled young man from our neighborhood? He did commit suicide a year later after which his parents moved out never to be heard from again. They were the butt of jokes anyway. I guess at some point down the line they must have failed completely useless and I won't be surprised if they decided to commit suicide too. This is why when in this novel, Hari's father mentions suicide as a means of him getting rid of 'shame', I immediately thought of this incidence from my childhood. And this is the victory of  'The Story of a Suicide'.

THE OVERVIEW

It starts off as a simple story of youngsters, their lives, their dreams, hopes, ambitions, confusions, struggles, all explained in our everyday language, making it extremely easy to relate to, while the specter of suicide hangs above. As we move on through the character's lives, we can all reminisce of our own college days as we all know someone like Mani, Hari, Sam or Charu. I sure know all of them. Behind all our faces, we have another face, a mask that keeps our secrets and these characters all have their secrets too which only we, the readers know. I feel that some topics could have been explained better, such as the burden of our education system which forces Mani to do something drastic. A large part of story is devoted to topics of sexuality, especially homosexuality, which is definitely a burning point when it comes to both our youngsters' fixation as well as modern times. It could have been toned down a bit. But keeping this minor nitpicking aside, the story has been woven in a simple way to drive home a larger point successfully. It actually works like a social treatise for those of us who yearn to understand humanity better.

There has to be special praise given to the beautiful illustrations that make the innermost emotions of desperation, dejection, loneliness and so on come alive. Truly, a killer walks among us all, in the form of all the negative emotions that can push us beyond the brink. Well done, Illustrations by Ghana!

FINAL WORDS

It is but natural that on reading a powerful story like this, everybody would have a handbook ready to be able to approach life in a better way :)

• Change begins from ME - Being positive in all my thoughts and actions is the first step to changing the world. Spreading this thought everywhere makes a difference. We make the society, so let's start building a better one today!.

• Keep an eye out - Souls that get hurt over and over seem to crawl into a shell, unaware that they can find a shoulder to cry on. Be that shoulder whenever, wherever possible.

• Stop Judgement Calls - None of us want to be judged, yet this is something we all indulge in, sadly :( Whenever we gossip, no matter how 'harmless' it seems, we just push forward the cause of hostility, ignorance and intolerance. Trying to put ourselves in someone else's shoes helps!

• Give life a second chance - Let's not get into political debates about 'rights' or 'wrongs'. There are a million reasons for which an individual might want to commit suicide, let us not brand them as 'cowards' etc. All we can do is take care of ourselves and those closest to us, keep an eye out for trouble and embrace everything with an open mind, a hopeful heart and a smile on our lips.

For everybody who sat through this treatise of mine, I heartily recommend reading The Story Of A Suicide. I am sure it will affect you as personally as it did me :)

All Pictures Source : Illustration by Ghana